a swiftly tilting blog.: Archive

Most episodes of Merlin:

Arthur: Merlin carry this object
Merlin: *drops it*
Arthur: Why are you so useless
Arthur: Why do I even keep you around
Arthur: You're so stupid
Arthur: And weak
Arthur: And useless
Arthur: And stupid
Arthur: And useless
Merlin: Yes I know *uses magic while Arthur's back is turned*
 A VISITOR COMES TO CAMELOT
Merlin: I'm gonna go for a walk around the castle/town/woods OH MY GOD THE VISITOR IS USING MAGIC I HAVE TO TELL GAIUS HE'S THE ONLY ONE WHO UNDERSTANDS ME *runs back to the castle*
Merlin: Gaius the visitor is using magic I saw it
Gaius: No I don't think so Merlin now don't do anything rash keep a low profile
Merlin: *sigh* Okay Gaius I'll listen to you
 MEANWHILE, IN MORGANA'S CHAMBERS
Uther: Morgana are you feeling all right
Morgana: Yes I'm fine you know I would tell you if something was wrong you're the only one I trust I love you so much you're like a father to me
Uther: And you are like a daughter to me and I would never let anything happen to you I will protect you til my dying breath *leaves*
Morgana: Muahahaha he has no idea I'm plotting to kill him
 MERLIN SPIES ON VISITOR DURING VISITOR'S ALONE TIME IN THEIR QUARTERS AND WITNESSES MAGIC A SECOND TIME
Merlin: *running back to Gaius* Okay Gaius I really saw it this time, this is what happened, they used this object/said these words/turned into this creature
Gaius: Are you sure?
Merlin: Yes I saw it they're gonna kill Arthur we have to tell Uther
Gaius: Merlin you can't go accusing them, Uther will never take the word of a servant against that of a knight/a guest of the king/a lady
Merlin: Okay I'll take care of it don't worry
 OBLIGATORY ARTHUR AND GWEN ANGST
Gwen: Arthur we can't be together
Arthur: I know
 MERLIN TALKS TO THE DRAGON
Merlin: Tell me how to defeat the bad guy
Dragon: Ahhhhh young warlock I knew this would happen 
Dragon: I knew I would see you 
Dragon: I know everything 
Dragon: You must protect Arthur
Dragon: Two sides of the same coin 
Dragon: Your destiny
Merlin: Please, can you at least give me a hint
Dragon: You must promise--
Merlin: FINE
 MERLIN ACQUIRES KNOWLEDGE/STRENGTH/ABILITY AND TRIES TO THWART THEM
 ONCE
 TWICE
 THIRD TIME'S THE CHARM
 SOMEHOW GAIUS'S STUDY MANAGES TO GET TRASHED IN THE PROCESS
 NONETHELESS, THE THREAT IS NEUTRALIZED
Gaius: Merlin I'm very proud of you, you saved the kingdom
Merlin: Thanks Gaius
Arthur: *bellowing* MERLIN YOU IDIOT WASH MY CLOTHES POLISH MY ARMOR MAKE MY BED SCRUB THE FLOORS YOU'RE SO USELESS
 This is how you write for the tee vee.